Talk Sh

LEARN AUSTRALIAN PHRASES

A diamond is just a lump of coal that did well under pressure. "A diamond is just a lump of coal that did well under pressure."
📈 103 VIEWS
a homosexual "a homosexual"
📈 126 VIEWS
Am Not "Am Not"
📈 128 VIEWS
An apple a day keeps the doctor away—if you throw it hard enough! "An apple a day keeps the doctor away—if you throw it hard enough!"
📈 96 VIEWS
Anything done before the first coffee of the day could be classified as self-defense. "Anything done before the first coffee of the day could be classified as self-defense."
📈 98 VIEWS
are you on your period? "are you on your period?"
📈 121 VIEWS
Are you ready to apologize? "Are you ready to apologize?"
📈 114 VIEWS
As cluster fucked as shitting and stepping in it "As cluster fucked as shitting and stepping in it"
📈 117 VIEWS
Ass fucker "Ass fucker"
📈 121 VIEWS
ass hole "ass hole"
📈 124 VIEWS
baddie "baddie"
📈 114 VIEWS
bald cunt "bald cunt"
📈 130 VIEWS
balls slapping against her chin "balls slapping against her chin"
📈 111 VIEWS
beating the meat "beating the meat"
📈 118 VIEWS
Beg me. "Beg me."
📈 113 VIEWS
Bent dick "Bent dick"
📈 123 VIEWS
Bent Richard "Bent Richard"
📈 122 VIEWS
blow my load "blow my load"
📈 105 VIEWS
blow my load on your face "blow my load on your face"
📈 111 VIEWS
boobs "boobs"
📈 118 VIEWS
booger suger "booger suger"
📈 110 VIEWS
bopping the bologna "bopping the bologna"
📈 104 VIEWS
bouncing bozos "bouncing bozos"
📈 119 VIEWS
breeder "breeder"
📈 121 VIEWS
bringing a fart to a shit fight "bringing a fart to a shit fight"
📈 92 VIEWS
bull shit "bull shit"
📈 117 VIEWS
but first anal... "but first anal..."
📈 109 VIEWS
butt pirate "butt pirate"
📈 118 VIEWS
butter face "butter face"
📈 115 VIEWS
calm down and shut up "calm down and shut up"
📈 125 VIEWS
can i fuck you from behind "can i fuck you from behind"
📈 102 VIEWS
Can I give you a blow job, master? "Can I give you a blow job, master?"
📈 83 VIEWS
Can i suck your boobs "Can i suck your boobs"
📈 117 VIEWS
Can you hear that? That’s my pillow calling, and it gets really mean if I make it wait too long. "Can you hear that? That’s my pillow calling, and it gets really mean if I make it wait too long."
📈 94 VIEWS
can you help me with something in the bedroom? "can you help me with something in the bedroom?"
📈 81 VIEWS
Can you tell me where I can find a hooker? "Can you tell me where I can find a hooker?"
📈 99 VIEWS
carpet muncher "carpet muncher"
📈 107 VIEWS
chimney sweeper "chimney sweeper"
📈 114 VIEWS
Choking the chicken "Choking the chicken"
📈 117 VIEWS
chutney ferret "chutney ferret"
📈 111 VIEWS
Cock eyed Cunt "Cock eyed Cunt"
📈 131 VIEWS
cock waffle "cock waffle"
📈 121 VIEWS
cockeye "cockeye"
📈 113 VIEWS
Cocklump "Cocklump"
📈 124 VIEWS
Cockscum "Cockscum"
📈 113 VIEWS
Colder than a steel toilet on the shady side of an iceberg "Colder than a steel toilet on the shady side of an iceberg"
📈 101 VIEWS
Colder than a witches titty in a brass bra "Colder than a witches titty in a brass bra"
📈 106 VIEWS
Congratulations: you’ve reached a level of wrongness previously reserved for horoscopes. "Congratulations: you’ve reached a level of wrongness previously reserved for horoscopes."
📈 90 VIEWS
coral stomper "coral stomper"
📈 115 VIEWS
Could you point me to the bathroom? I have a stool appointment. "Could you point me to the bathroom? I have a stool appointment."
📈 89 VIEWS
Creampie "Creampie"
📈 97 VIEWS
Cretinous cunting fuckhead "Cretinous cunting fuckhead"
📈 112 VIEWS
cum "cum"
📈 110 VIEWS
cum dumpster "cum dumpster"
📈 104 VIEWS
cun "cun"
📈 112 VIEWS
cunt "cunt"
📈 109 VIEWS
cunt face "cunt face"
📈 112 VIEWS
cunt lapper "cunt lapper"
📈 105 VIEWS
curry muncher "curry muncher"
📈 137 VIEWS
Deeper, Deeper, DEEPER! "Deeper, Deeper, DEEPER!"
📈 98 VIEWS
Derby County Fan "Derby County Fan"
📈 114 VIEWS
dick face "dick face"
📈 111 VIEWS
Dick juggling thunder cunt "Dick juggling thunder cunt"
📈 113 VIEWS
Dickhead "Dickhead"
📈 116 VIEWS
did you just wake up? "did you just wake up?"
📈 101 VIEWS
die in a fire "die in a fire"
📈 112 VIEWS
dipshit "dipshit"
📈 110 VIEWS
Dirty Wanker "Dirty Wanker"
📈 113 VIEWS
dirty whore "dirty whore"
📈 115 VIEWS
Do you have any drugs? "Do you have any drugs?"
📈 108 VIEWS
do you like dick? "do you like dick?"
📈 101 VIEWS
do you want to fuck? "do you want to fuck?"
📈 98 VIEWS
Do you want to try anal with me? "Do you want to try anal with me?"
📈 92 VIEWS
Don't be a dick "Don't be a dick"
📈 112 VIEWS
Don't Talk Shit to me "Don't Talk Shit to me"
📈 124 VIEWS
Don’t look at me like that when we’re here; it’s making me so fucking horny. "Don’t look at me like that when we’re here; it’s making me so fucking horny."
📈 84 VIEWS
Don’t stop. "Don’t stop."
📈 119 VIEWS
Don’t you tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon. "Don’t you tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
📈 90 VIEWS
Donald Trump fucks children "Donald Trump fucks children"
📈 106 VIEWS
Donald Trump is a pedophile "Donald Trump is a pedophile"
📈 109 VIEWS
Donald Trump is the worst president ever "Donald Trump is the worst president ever"
📈 93 VIEWS
Doublelift "Doublelift"
📈 120 VIEWS
douche nozzle "douche nozzle"
📈 100 VIEWS
douchebag "douchebag"
📈 97 VIEWS
dumb bitch "dumb bitch"
📈 116 VIEWS
dumb cunt "dumb cunt"
📈 113 VIEWS
dumpster cunt "dumpster cunt"
📈 102 VIEWS
dyke "dyke"
📈 107 VIEWS
eat a penis "eat a penis"
📈 114 VIEWS
eat my butthole "eat my butthole"
📈 104 VIEWS
eat my butthole and die "eat my butthole and die"
📈 157 VIEWS
Eat my dust "Eat my dust"
📈 106 VIEWS
eat my pussy like you want it "eat my pussy like you want it"
📈 174 VIEWS
faggot "faggot"
📈 116 VIEWS
fat bitch "fat bitch"
📈 110 VIEWS
First you're going to get down on your knees. Then you're going to taste me. "First you're going to get down on your knees. Then you're going to taste me."
📈 88 VIEWS
flamer "flamer"
📈 105 VIEWS
flamer "flamer"
📈 0 VIEWS
flamer "flamer"
📈 105 VIEWS
flamer "flamer"
📈 0 VIEWS
fruit cake "fruit cake"
📈 108 VIEWS
Fuck Donald Trump "Fuck Donald Trump"
📈 118 VIEWS
fuck it "fuck it"
📈 99 VIEWS
Fuck Maritza "Fuck Maritza"
📈 105 VIEWS
fuck me "fuck me"
📈 108 VIEWS
fuck me gently with a chainsaw "fuck me gently with a chainsaw"
📈 96 VIEWS
fuck me hard "fuck me hard"
📈 103 VIEWS
fuck me hard "fuck me hard"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck me hard "fuck me hard"
📈 103 VIEWS
fuck me hard "fuck me hard"
📈 0 VIEWS
Fuck me hard. "Fuck me hard."
📈 108 VIEWS
Fuck me hard...hurt me "Fuck me hard...hurt me"
📈 107 VIEWS
fuck me harder "fuck me harder"
📈 113 VIEWS
Fuck me in the ass you motherfucking pussy. "Fuck me in the ass you motherfucking pussy."
📈 87 VIEWS
Fuck me like a porn star "Fuck me like a porn star"
📈 105 VIEWS
fuck me like an animal "fuck me like an animal"
📈 97 VIEWS
Fuck me, fuck me! "Fuck me, fuck me!"
📈 100 VIEWS
FUCK MY PUSSY!!!!!! "FUCK MY PUSSY!!!!!!"
📈 109 VIEWS
fuck off Karen "fuck off Karen"
📈 105 VIEWS
Fuck off wanker "Fuck off wanker"
📈 125 VIEWS
Fuck you bastard "Fuck you bastard"
📈 123 VIEWS
fuck you bitch "fuck you bitch"
📈 203 VIEWS
Fuck you bitch "Fuck you bitch"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck you bitch "fuck you bitch"
📈 203 VIEWS
Fuck you bitch "Fuck you bitch"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck you cunt "fuck you cunt"
📈 323 VIEWS
Fuck you cunt "Fuck you cunt"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck you cunt "fuck you cunt"
📈 323 VIEWS
Fuck you cunt "Fuck you cunt"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck your asshole "fuck your asshole"
📈 104 VIEWS
fuck your asshole "fuck your asshole"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck your asshole "fuck your asshole"
📈 104 VIEWS
fuck your asshole "fuck your asshole"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck your mom "fuck your mom"
📈 110 VIEWS
fuck your mom "fuck your mom"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck your mom "fuck your mom"
📈 110 VIEWS
fuck your mom "fuck your mom"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck your mom's asshole "fuck your mom's asshole"
📈 107 VIEWS
fuck your mom's asshole "fuck your mom's asshole"
📈 0 VIEWS
fuck your mom's asshole "fuck your mom's asshole"
📈 107 VIEWS
fuck your mom's asshole "fuck your mom's asshole"
📈 0 VIEWS
Fuck your mother "Fuck your mother"
📈 109 VIEWS
Fucking animal "Fucking animal"
📈 109 VIEWS
fucking animal "fucking animal"
📈 0 VIEWS
Fucking animal "Fucking animal"
📈 109 VIEWS
fucking animal "fucking animal"
📈 0 VIEWS
fucking idiot "fucking idiot"
📈 109 VIEWS
fucking tease "fucking tease"
📈 100 VIEWS
fucktwat "fucktwat"
📈 109 VIEWS
fuckwitFur Bunny "fuckwitFur Bunny"
📈 109 VIEWS
Get fucked "Get fucked"
📈 113 VIEWS
get lost "get lost"
📈 106 VIEWS
Get lost, loser "Get lost, loser"
📈 108 VIEWS
Give me a kiss "Give me a kiss"
📈 106 VIEWS
go finger yourself "go finger yourself"
📈 111 VIEWS
go lick a duck "go lick a duck"
📈 99 VIEWS
Go make me a sandwich "Go make me a sandwich"
📈 109 VIEWS
Go masturbate your dog "Go masturbate your dog"
📈 110 VIEWS
gobble the helmet spit "gobble the helmet spit"
📈 102 VIEWS
grab her by the pussy "grab her by the pussy"
📈 121 VIEWS
Grab my hair and fuck me like a dog. "Grab my hair and fuck me like a dog."
📈 92 VIEWS
hard dick "hard dick"
📈 106 VIEWS
hard oral sex "hard oral sex"
📈 109 VIEWS
Has a guy ever complimented you on your blowjob skills? "Has a guy ever complimented you on your blowjob skills?"
📈 82 VIEWS
he likes dick "he likes dick"
📈 108 VIEWS
Help! I got my penis caught in my zipper again. "Help! I got my penis caught in my zipper again."
📈 90 VIEWS
her pussy is as hairy as an 80's pornstar "her pussy is as hairy as an 80's pornstar"
📈 82 VIEWS
her pussy is as wet as an otters pocket "her pussy is as wet as an otters pocket"
📈 85 VIEWS
Here I am! What are your other two wishes? "Here I am! What are your other two wishes?"
📈 92 VIEWS
heterosexual "heterosexual"
📈 116 VIEWS
Hide Yourself "Hide Yourself"
📈 109 VIEWS
his dick looks like a prisoners leg "his dick looks like a prisoners leg"
📈 93 VIEWS
Holy shit, I’m cumming. "Holy shit, I’m cumming."
📈 104 VIEWS
how the fuck "how the fuck"
📈 101 VIEWS
hurt me "hurt me"
📈 106 VIEWS
I actually sold the vacuum cleaner. All it was doing was gathering dust. "I actually sold the vacuum cleaner. All it was doing was gathering dust."
📈 94 VIEWS
I always say “Morning” instead of “Good morning”—if it were a good morning, I’d be sleeping and not talking to people. "I always say “Morning” instead of “Good morning”—if it were a good morning, I’d be sleeping and not talking to people."
📈 90 VIEWS
I am looking for a hooker with a penis "I am looking for a hooker with a penis"
📈 103 VIEWS
I can’t believe I met you. "I can’t believe I met you."
📈 105 VIEWS
I can’t believe we decided to go shopping when we could be at home fucking. "I can’t believe we decided to go shopping when we could be at home fucking."
📈 142 VIEWS
I can’t concentrate at work. All I can think about is sucking your dick. "I can’t concentrate at work. All I can think about is sucking your dick."
📈 88 VIEWS
I can’t wait to get you home. "I can’t wait to get you home."
📈 98 VIEWS
I don’t need a new hairstylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. "I don’t need a new hairstylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning."
📈 89 VIEWS
I dreamt about you last night, and it was fantastic, but I woke up, and you weren’t here. "I dreamt about you last night, and it was fantastic, but I woke up, and you weren’t here."
📈 92 VIEWS
I feel tiny in your arms. "I feel tiny in your arms."
📈 101 VIEWS
I finally found a machine at the gym that I like: the vending machine. "I finally found a machine at the gym that I like: the vending machine."
📈 95 VIEWS
I fucked your mom last night "I fucked your mom last night"
📈 103 VIEWS
i hate looking at you "i hate looking at you"
📈 112 VIEWS
I have the body of a god—unfortunately the god of small, depressing villages. "I have the body of a god—unfortunately the god of small, depressing villages."
📈 98 VIEWS
i hope you die "i hope you die"
📈 118 VIEWS
I hope you outlive your children "I hope you outlive your children"
📈 101 VIEWS
i hope you rot in hell "i hope you rot in hell"
📈 108 VIEWS
i just took a massive shit "i just took a massive shit"
📈 144 VIEWS
I just wanna be your sex slut. "I just wanna be your sex slut."
📈 95 VIEWS
I just want to make you happy. "I just want to make you happy."
📈 99 VIEWS
I just want to rip your clothes off right now. "I just want to rip your clothes off right now."
📈 93 VIEWS
I just want you to know I’m dripping wet. "I just want you to know I’m dripping wet."
📈 84 VIEWS
I keep fantasizing about what I’m going to do to you later. "I keep fantasizing about what I’m going to do to you later."
📈 88 VIEWS
I keep thinking about just quitting school/my job and coming to see you tonight. "I keep thinking about just quitting school/my job and coming to see you tonight."
📈 105 VIEWS
I like big butts "I like big butts"
📈 109 VIEWS
I love being your fuck slut "I love being your fuck slut"
📈 94 VIEWS
I love masturbating while talking to you, but what I really need is you, here, fucking me. "I love masturbating while talking to you, but what I really need is you, here, fucking me."
📈 89 VIEWS
I love you "I love you"
📈 96 VIEWS
I love you. "I love you."
📈 105 VIEWS
I love your body "I love your body"
📈 98 VIEWS
I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it. "I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it."
📈 93 VIEWS
I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it. "I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it."
📈 0 VIEWS
I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it. "I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it."
📈 93 VIEWS
I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it. "I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it."
📈 0 VIEWS
I need you so bad right now. "I need you so bad right now."
📈 94 VIEWS
I need you to walk in front of me so I can see your ass. "I need you to walk in front of me so I can see your ass."
📈 84 VIEWS
I need your cock! "I need your cock!"
📈 104 VIEWS
I never make the same mistake twice. I make it six or seven times, just to be sure. "I never make the same mistake twice. I make it six or seven times, just to be sure."
📈 92 VIEWS
I think i crapped my pants "I think i crapped my pants"
📈 113 VIEWS
I think I’m in love with your dick. "I think I’m in love with your dick."
📈 87 VIEWS
I think I’m in love with your pussy. "I think I’m in love with your pussy."
📈 92 VIEWS
I told my boss to have a nice life. He said he already has one—I didn’t realize unemployment could be smug. "I told my boss to have a nice life. He said he already has one—I didn’t realize unemployment could be smug."
📈 86 VIEWS
I want to feel you shoot your load in my mouth. "I want to feel you shoot your load in my mouth."
📈 85 VIEWS
I want to feel your cum all over my face. "I want to feel your cum all over my face."
📈 83 VIEWS
I want to fuck you like a dog and cum inside your pussy "I want to fuck you like a dog and cum inside your pussy"
📈 95 VIEWS
i want to fuck you like an animal "i want to fuck you like an animal"
📈 91 VIEWS
I want to hear you say my name, say it bitch. "I want to hear you say my name, say it bitch."
📈 93 VIEWS
I want to taste myself on your cock. "I want to taste myself on your cock."
📈 88 VIEWS
I want to watch you masturbate "I want to watch you masturbate"
📈 105 VIEWS
I want you so bad. "I want you so bad."
📈 103 VIEWS
I want you to shoot your load in my mouth. "I want you to shoot your load in my mouth."
📈 90 VIEWS
I want you to shoot your load on my tits "I want you to shoot your load on my tits"
📈 140 VIEWS
I was going to offer you a drink, but your standards are already watered down. "I was going to offer you a drink, but your standards are already watered down."
📈 99 VIEWS
I was thinking about you today. "I was thinking about you today."
📈 93 VIEWS
I wish I could just clone your dick, so I have something to remind me of you. "I wish I could just clone your dick, so I have something to remind me of you."
📈 82 VIEWS
I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you. "I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you."
📈 86 VIEWS
I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you. "I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you."
📈 0 VIEWS
I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you. "I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you."
📈 86 VIEWS
I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you. "I wish we were at home, so I could do some terrible things to you."
📈 0 VIEWS
I won’t say you’re clingy—let’s just say you’ve got more hold than cheap superglue. "I won’t say you’re clingy—let’s just say you’ve got more hold than cheap superglue."
📈 96 VIEWS
I wore this skirt just for you. "I wore this skirt just for you."
📈 88 VIEWS
I'm gonna beat the shit out of you "I'm gonna beat the shit out of you"
📈 99 VIEWS
i'm sorry my love "i'm sorry my love"
📈 105 VIEWS
I've got a spare minute tell me everything you know "I've got a spare minute tell me everything you know"
📈 98 VIEWS
I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I’m afraid you’d be promoted to manager. "I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I’m afraid you’d be promoted to manager."
📈 86 VIEWS
I’m about as comfortable as a whore in 8 am church service "I’m about as comfortable as a whore in 8 am church service"
📈 97 VIEWS
I’m about to explode. "I’m about to explode."
📈 101 VIEWS
I’m blushing just saying this, but I miss your dick so much. "I’m blushing just saying this, but I miss your dick so much."
📈 91 VIEWS
I’m dripping wet. "I’m dripping wet."
📈 96 VIEWS
I’m glad I don’t have to hunt for my own food. I have no idea where sandwiches live. "I’m glad I don’t have to hunt for my own food. I have no idea where sandwiches live."
📈 87 VIEWS
I’m going to give you the wettest blowjob tonight. "I’m going to give you the wettest blowjob tonight."
📈 100 VIEWS
I’m going to jerk you off until I get every last drop out of you. "I’m going to jerk you off until I get every last drop out of you."
📈 89 VIEWS
I’m not lazy. I’m just highly motivated to do nothing. "I’m not lazy. I’m just highly motivated to do nothing."
📈 90 VIEWS
I’m not lazy. I’m just very relaxed. "I’m not lazy. I’m just very relaxed."
📈 92 VIEWS
I’m not saying I’m overreacting. But there are good times and there are bad times to hand me a chainsaw. "I’m not saying I’m overreacting. But there are good times and there are bad times to hand me a chainsaw."
📈 94 VIEWS
I’m not saying I’m ugly, but my reflection asked for an escort home. "I’m not saying I’m ugly, but my reflection asked for an escort home."
📈 83 VIEWS
I’m not weird. I’m limited edition. "I’m not weird. I’m limited edition."
📈 92 VIEWS
I’ve been very bold and need to be punished. "I’ve been very bold and need to be punished."
📈 93 VIEWS
I’ve never been fucked like this before. "I’ve never been fucked like this before."
📈 93 VIEWS
If I offered to cook for you in lingerie and heels, what would you say? Or would you rather I wear something else? "If I offered to cook for you in lingerie and heels, what would you say? Or would you rather I wear something else?"
📈 78 VIEWS
If karma doesn’t hit you, I will "If karma doesn’t hit you, I will"
📈 102 VIEWS
If life gives you lemons, throw them at people you dislike—vitamin C with attitude. "If life gives you lemons, throw them at people you dislike—vitamin C with attitude."
📈 89 VIEWS
If money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches? "If money doesn’t grow on trees, why do banks have branches?"
📈 88 VIEWS
If the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off of it! "If the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off of it!"
📈 87 VIEWS
If we weren’t at your friend’s house, I’d be on my knees with you in my mouth. "If we weren’t at your friend’s house, I’d be on my knees with you in my mouth."
📈 85 VIEWS
If you don’t have haters, you’re probably not on the GPS of anyone’s drama. "If you don’t have haters, you’re probably not on the GPS of anyone’s drama."
📈 90 VIEWS
If you don’t stop looking at me like that, we’re going to have to go somewhere private. "If you don’t stop looking at me like that, we’re going to have to go somewhere private."
📈 86 VIEWS
It’s OK if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste. "It’s OK if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste."
📈 86 VIEWS
It’s so hot when you grab me in public. "It’s so hot when you grab me in public."
📈 82 VIEWS
Just like that. "Just like that."
📈 109 VIEWS
kiss my ass "kiss my ass"
📈 99 VIEWS
kiss my black ass "kiss my black ass"
📈 100 VIEWS
Last night was incredible. I can’t stop thinking about it. "Last night was incredible. I can’t stop thinking about it."
📈 100 VIEWS
lesbian "lesbian"
📈 104 VIEWS
Let's go loser, we're going shopping. "Let's go loser, we're going shopping."
📈 92 VIEWS
Let’s spend the entire weekend together completely naked! "Let’s spend the entire weekend together completely naked!"
📈 93 VIEWS
lick spittle "lick spittle"
📈 100 VIEWS
Lie down and shut up. "Lie down and shut up."
📈 103 VIEWS
Life is a bowl of soup, and I’m a fork. "Life is a bowl of soup, and I’m a fork."
📈 87 VIEWS
look at this nigga "look at this nigga"
📈 105 VIEWS
make me a sandwich "make me a sandwich"
📈 109 VIEWS
Make me cum, baby. "Make me cum, baby."
📈 101 VIEWS
May I please be excused? My brain is full. "May I please be excused? My brain is full."
📈 97 VIEWS
Mmmmmm, you taste so good. "Mmmmmm, you taste so good."
📈 99 VIEWS
My brain says “crunches” but my stomach says “cupcakes.” "My brain says “crunches” but my stomach says “cupcakes.”"
📈 105 VIEWS
My dating life is like a software beta: lots of bugs, endless updates, no launch date. "My dating life is like a software beta: lots of bugs, endless updates, no launch date."
📈 83 VIEWS
My family redefines ‘dysfunctional’—we’re a limited-time exhibit on bad decisions. "My family redefines ‘dysfunctional’—we’re a limited-time exhibit on bad decisions."
📈 114 VIEWS
my last girlfriend didn't do this to me "my last girlfriend didn't do this to me"
📈 99 VIEWS
My panties are soaked. Get home quick. "My panties are soaked. Get home quick."
📈 94 VIEWS
My relationship is like an iPad. I don’t have an iPad. "My relationship is like an iPad. I don’t have an iPad."
📈 82 VIEWS
My wallet is like an onion. Every time I open it, it makes me cry. "My wallet is like an onion. Every time I open it, it makes me cry."
📈 92 VIEWS
Nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs "Nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs"
📈 99 VIEWS
nigga "nigga"
📈 92 VIEWS
nigga please "nigga please"
📈 109 VIEWS
Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice. "Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice."
📈 96 VIEWS
Off in that general direction is where I want you to fuck "Off in that general direction is where I want you to fuck"
📈 96 VIEWS
Oh my god Becky, look at her butt "Oh my god Becky, look at her butt"
📈 85 VIEWS
Oh-my-fucking-god! "Oh-my-fucking-god!"
📈 105 VIEWS
On your knees, bitch. "On your knees, bitch."
📈 106 VIEWS
once you go black you never go back "once you go black you never go back"
📈 86 VIEWS
one coffee please "one coffee please"
📈 107 VIEWS
Organized people are those who are just too lazy to find their things. "Organized people are those who are just too lazy to find their things."
📈 110 VIEWS
Our family tree is more of a cactus—spiky, low-maintenance, and occasionally poisonous. "Our family tree is more of a cactus—spiky, low-maintenance, and occasionally poisonous."
📈 89 VIEWS
Paint my face. "Paint my face."
📈 96 VIEWS
Paint the walls with your brain "Paint the walls with your brain"
📈 99 VIEWS
panty dropper "panty dropper"
📈 89 VIEWS
Penis "Penis"
📈 118 VIEWS
Please "Please"
📈 109 VIEWS
please ask my testacles "please ask my testacles"
📈 111 VIEWS
Please fuck me, daddy. "Please fuck me, daddy."
📈 100 VIEWS
Please, please, Please, PLEEAAAASSSSEEEEE… – Say it like you are almost begging him. "Please, please, Please, PLEEAAAASSSSEEEEE… – Say it like you are almost begging him."
📈 91 VIEWS
Pleasing you is my only purpose in life. "Pleasing you is my only purpose in life."
📈 92 VIEWS
Pound me harder! "Pound me harder!"
📈 108 VIEWS
saggy tits "saggy tits"
📈 101 VIEWS
scumbag "scumbag"
📈 108 VIEWS
semen "semen"
📈 110 VIEWS
She doesn't even go here. "She doesn't even go here."
📈 109 VIEWS
shit gibbon "shit gibbon"
📈 137 VIEWS
show your tits "show your tits"
📈 101 VIEWS
show your tits! "show your tits!"
📈 101 VIEWS
shut the fuck up "shut the fuck up"
📈 114 VIEWS
shut the hell up "shut the hell up"
📈 100 VIEWS
shut up "shut up"
📈 102 VIEWS
shut your god damn mouth "shut your god damn mouth"
📈 101 VIEWS
Somebody said today that I’m lazy. I nearly answered him. "Somebody said today that I’m lazy. I nearly answered him."
📈 89 VIEWS
son of a prostitute "son of a prostitute"
📈 107 VIEWS
Suck my dick asshole. "Suck my dick asshole."
📈 114 VIEWS
Suck start a shotgun "Suck start a shotgun"
📈 114 VIEWS
Sweating like a gypsy with a morgage "Sweating like a gypsy with a morgage"
📈 92 VIEWS
Take your clothes off and get into bed. "Take your clothes off and get into bed."
📈 86 VIEWS
Take your clothes off. Lie down. Shut up. "Take your clothes off. Lie down. Shut up."
📈 86 VIEWS
Thank you for fucking me. "Thank you for fucking me."
📈 95 VIEWS
That feels so good. "That feels so good."
📈 103 VIEWS
thick as pig shit "thick as pig shit"
📈 102 VIEWS
tight as a ducks ass "tight as a ducks ass"
📈 97 VIEWS
tits "tits"
📈 104 VIEWS
Tonight is all about me. "Tonight is all about me."
📈 107 VIEWS
Tonight is all about you. "Tonight is all about you."
📈 99 VIEWS
Tonight, I’m going to be inside YOU. "Tonight, I’m going to be inside YOU."
📈 90 VIEWS
turd "turd"
📈 107 VIEWS
Useful as a one legged man in an ass kicking contest "Useful as a one legged man in an ass kicking contest"
📈 87 VIEWS
Useless "Useless"
📈 105 VIEWS
Useless piece of shit "Useless piece of shit"
📈 101 VIEWS
Well, well, well, look at what the cat dragged in! "Well, well, well, look at what the cat dragged in!"
📈 94 VIEWS
wet pussy "wet pussy"
📈 97 VIEWS
What color is your underwear "What color is your underwear"
📈 104 VIEWS
what do you want for dinner? "what do you want for dinner?"
📈 104 VIEWS
What do you want me to wear in bed tonight? "What do you want me to wear in bed tonight?"
📈 90 VIEWS
what the devil "what the devil"
📈 118 VIEWS
What the fuck do you want? "What the fuck do you want?"
📈 97 VIEWS
what the fuck dude "what the fuck dude"
📈 109 VIEWS
What's cooking, good lookin'? "What's cooking, good lookin'?"
📈 106 VIEWS
Whatever you’re doing, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood. "Whatever you’re doing, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood."
📈 87 VIEWS
When people tell me, “You’re going to regret that in the morning,” I sleep until noon because I’m a problem solver. "When people tell me, “You’re going to regret that in the morning,” I sleep until noon because I’m a problem solver."
📈 86 VIEWS
Where is the bathroom? "Where is the bathroom?"
📈 110 VIEWS
Which way to the hookers? "Which way to the hookers?"
📈 99 VIEWS
whore "whore"
📈 106 VIEWS
Why am I always so horny when there are other people around? "Why am I always so horny when there are other people around?"
📈 79 VIEWS
Why aren’t you here right now? I’m so fucking horny. "Why aren’t you here right now? I’m so fucking horny."
📈 78 VIEWS
Why be moody when you can shake your booty?! "Why be moody when you can shake your booty?!"
📈 90 VIEWS
Why can’t we just quit our jobs, live together, and fuck all day, every day? "Why can’t we just quit our jobs, live together, and fuck all day, every day?"
📈 85 VIEWS
will you fuck me? "will you fuck me?"
📈 95 VIEWS
you are completely right "you are completely right"
📈 108 VIEWS
you are so fat "you are so fat"
📈 113 VIEWS
you are so fine "you are so fine"
📈 106 VIEWS
you are so ugly "you are so ugly"
📈 107 VIEWS
you are such a baddie "you are such a baddie"
📈 113 VIEWS
You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room. "You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room."
📈 91 VIEWS
You know I’m not wearing panties? "You know I’m not wearing panties?"
📈 88 VIEWS
You know what they say: Dynamite comes in small packages. "You know what they say: Dynamite comes in small packages."
📈 97 VIEWS
You like that, baby? "You like that, baby?"
📈 103 VIEWS
You look really sexy when you wear that shirt. "You look really sexy when you wear that shirt."
📈 77 VIEWS
You make me feel amazing, baby. "You make me feel amazing, baby."
📈 96 VIEWS
You miserable fucking bastard "You miserable fucking bastard"
📈 98 VIEWS
You miserable fucking bitch "You miserable fucking bitch"
📈 97 VIEWS
you're a baddi "you're a baddi"
📈 108 VIEWS
you're a baddie "you're a baddie"
📈 131 VIEWS
you're a cunt, fuck off "you're a cunt, fuck off"
📈 106 VIEWS
You're fucking this goat, I'm just here to hold the horns "You're fucking this goat, I'm just here to hold the horns"
📈 97 VIEWS
You're higher than giraffe pussy "You're higher than giraffe pussy"
📈 105 VIEWS
You’re going to get spanked until you cry "You’re going to get spanked until you cry"
📈 91 VIEWS
You’re going to make me pass out with pleasure. "You’re going to make me pass out with pleasure."
📈 91 VIEWS
You’re proof evolution can go backward with proper motivation. "You’re proof evolution can go backward with proper motivation."
📈 104 VIEWS
your face looks like an ass "your face looks like an ass"
📈 111 VIEWS
Your personality is like decaf: disappointing but could still ruin my night "Your personality is like decaf: disappointing but could still ruin my night"
📈 98 VIEWS
Your wish is my command. "Your wish is my command."
📈 112 VIEWS