Talk Sh

LEARN COCKNEY RHYMING SLANG PHRASES

a homosexual "Iron (Iron Hoof)"
📈 26 VIEWS
Am Not "Ain't Adam and Eve"
📈 28 VIEWS
are you on your period? "Are you on the rag and bone?"
📈 25 VIEWS
Are you ready to apologize? "Are you ready to dustbin lid?"
📈 28 VIEWS
As cluster fucked as shitting and stepping in it "As Barnet Fair as a dog and bone in it"
📈 22 VIEWS
Ass fucker "Arse Tucker"
📈 22 VIEWS
ass hole "Khyber Pass"
📈 23 VIEWS
bald cunt "bald cunt"
📈 29 VIEWS
balls slapping against her chin "balls slapping against her chin"
📈 26 VIEWS
beating the meat "beating the meat"
📈 25 VIEWS
Bent dick "Crooked stick"
📈 24 VIEWS
Bent Richard "Bent Richard"
📈 25 VIEWS
Billions of bilious blue blistering barnacles in a thundering typhoon "Millions of mincing marbles in a rumbling monsoon"
📈 26 VIEWS
blow me "Kiss me 'arris"
📈 24 VIEWS
blow my load "Shoot me toad"
📈 29 VIEWS
blow my load on your face "Spaff me toad race on your boat race"
📈 26 VIEWS
boobs "Bristol Cities"
📈 28 VIEWS
booger suger "Billy Whizz"
📈 29 VIEWS
bopping the bologna "Hitting the frog and toad"
📈 29 VIEWS
bouncing bozos "Kangaroo Noses"
📈 26 VIEWS
breeder "Kid and Reeder"
📈 30 VIEWS
bringing a fart to a shit fight "Bringing a raspberry to a brown bread fight."
📈 27 VIEWS
bull shit "Cows and Kisses"
📈 31 VIEWS
butt pirate "Rusty gate"
📈 28 VIEWS
butter face "Boat race"
📈 24 VIEWS
calm down and shut up "Simmer down and button your lip."
📈 22 VIEWS
can i fuck you from behind "Can I give you a bit of the old back door?"
📈 25 VIEWS
Can i suck your boobs "Can I have a butcher's at your Bristols?"
📈 30 VIEWS
carpet muncher "Rug muncher"
📈 27 VIEWS
chimney sweeper "Beeping bleeper"
📈 25 VIEWS
Choking the chicken "Strangling the parrot"
📈 24 VIEWS
chutney ferret "Chutney ferret"
📈 27 VIEWS
Cock eyed Cunt "Pissed as a Newt"
📈 24 VIEWS
cock waffle "Bollocks and Toffee Apple"
📈 24 VIEWS
cockeye "Pork pie"
📈 25 VIEWS
Cocklump "Plum and Apple"
📈 26 VIEWS
Cockscum "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 27 VIEWS
Colder than a steel toilet on the shady side of an iceberg "Colder than a brass monkey's arse."
📈 25 VIEWS
Colder than a witches titty in a brass bra "Colder than a witch's tit in a brassiere."
📈 27 VIEWS
Congratulations: you’ve reached a level of wrongness previously reserved for horoscopes. "Congratulations: you’ve reached a level of wrongness previously reserved for porky pies."
📈 27 VIEWS
coral stomper "Pearl and Dean"
📈 26 VIEWS
Creampie "Apple pie"
📈 30 VIEWS
Cretinous cunting fuckhead "Berkshire Hunt daft tit"
📈 22 VIEWS
cum "Bristol City"
📈 20 VIEWS
cum dumpster "Spunk bin"
📈 24 VIEWS
cun "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 23 VIEWS
cunt "cunt"
📈 27 VIEWS
cunt face "Boat race"
📈 23 VIEWS
cunt lapper "Hampstead Heath"
📈 24 VIEWS
curry muncher "Ruby Murray muncher"
📈 23 VIEWS
Derby County Fan "Rams Supporter"
📈 26 VIEWS
dick face "Boat race"
📈 26 VIEWS
Dick juggling thunder cunt "Prick juggling blunder punt"
📈 27 VIEWS
Dickhead "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 23 VIEWS
did you just wake up? "Did you just have a butcher's at the kip?"
📈 23 VIEWS
die in a fire "Snuff it in a pyre"
📈 30 VIEWS
dildo munching gutter slut "Dildo munching gutter slut doesn't have a direct equivalent in Cockney Rhyming Slang. However, a culturally adapted version could be: "Dildo noshing alley tart."
📈 24 VIEWS
dipshit "Plonker"
📈 28 VIEWS
Dirty Wanker "Filthy Banker"
📈 26 VIEWS
dirty whore "Filthy floor"
📈 23 VIEWS
Do you have any drugs? "Do you have any Charlie Sheens?"
📈 24 VIEWS
do you like dick? "Do you like Hampton Wick?"
📈 25 VIEWS
do you want to fuck? "Do you fancy a bit of Hanky Panky?"
📈 24 VIEWS
Don't be a dick "Don't be a Berkshire Hunt."
📈 21 VIEWS
Don't Talk Shit to me "Don't Rabbit and Pork to me"
📈 24 VIEWS
Donald Trump fucks children "Donald Trump does the old Kent Road with the ankle biters."
📈 21 VIEWS
Donald Trump is a pedophile "Donald Trump is a tea leaf."
📈 25 VIEWS
Doublelift "Trouble and Strife"
📈 28 VIEWS
douche nozzle "Berkshire nozzle"
📈 21 VIEWS
douchebag "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 27 VIEWS
dumb bitch "Thick snitch"
📈 24 VIEWS
dumb cunt "Thick Hunt"
📈 24 VIEWS
dumpster cunt "Skip and Hunt"
📈 26 VIEWS
dyke "Lezza (short for "lesbian," as "dyke" doesn't have a direct Cockney Rhyming Slang equivalent)"
📈 26 VIEWS
eat a penis "Have a butcher's at a Venus."
📈 25 VIEWS
eat my butthole "Chew me Khyber Pass"
📈 24 VIEWS
eat my butthole and die "Munch me Khyber and fry."
📈 24 VIEWS
Eat my dust "Scoff me crust"
📈 29 VIEWS
eat my pussy like you want it "Munch me cat like you fancy that"
📈 23 VIEWS
faggot "Puff and Blow"
📈 27 VIEWS
fat bitch "Wide snitch"
📈 26 VIEWS
flamer "Blame and Shamer"
📈 26 VIEWS
flamer "Blame and Shamer"
📈 26 VIEWS
fruit cake "Daisy Drake"
📈 25 VIEWS
Fuck Donald Trump "Duck and Dive Donald Trump"
📈 25 VIEWS
fuck it "Duck and Dive"
📈 23 VIEWS
Fuck Maritza "Duck and Dive Maritza"
📈 27 VIEWS
fuck me "Plates of meat"
📈 24 VIEWS
fuck me gently with a chainsaw "Screw me softly with a seesaw"
📈 20 VIEWS
fuck me hard "Berkshire Hunt me hard"
📈 24 VIEWS
fuck me hard "Berkshire Hunt me hard"
📈 24 VIEWS
Fuck me hard...hurt me "Give me a butcher's...do me a Bert."
📈 26 VIEWS
fuck me harder "Berk me slaughter"
📈 24 VIEWS
Fuck me in the ass you motherfucking pussy. "Berk me in the Khyber you motherfucking cat."
📈 20 VIEWS
Fuck me like a porn star "Screw me like a film star"
📈 19 VIEWS
FUCK MY PUSSY!!!!!! "Cor blimey, me cat's gone batty!!!!!!"
📈 23 VIEWS
fuck off Karen "Sling yer 'ook, Sharon"
📈 21 VIEWS
Fuck off wanker "Sling yer hook, merchant banker"
📈 29 VIEWS
Fuck you bastard "Up yours, you plastered."
📈 25 VIEWS
fuck you bitch "Screw you, dog and bone."
📈 47 VIEWS
fuck you bitch "Screw you, dog and bone."
📈 47 VIEWS
fuck you cunt "Get stuffed, you Berkshire Hunt."
📈 46 VIEWS
fuck you cunt "Get stuffed, you Berkshire Hunt."
📈 46 VIEWS
fuck your asshole "Screw your Khyber Pass."
📈 24 VIEWS
fuck your asshole "Screw your Khyber Pass."
📈 24 VIEWS
fuck your mom "Trouble and Strife your old pot and pan."
📈 24 VIEWS
fuck your mom "Trouble and Strife your old pot and pan."
📈 24 VIEWS
fuck your mom's asshole "Screw your trouble and strife's bottle."
📈 20 VIEWS
fuck your mom's asshole "Screw your trouble and strife's bottle."
📈 20 VIEWS
Fuck your mother "Screw your old trouble and strife"
📈 28 VIEWS
Fucking animal "Barking Barnacle"
📈 24 VIEWS
Fucking animal "Barking Barnacle"
📈 24 VIEWS
fucking idiot "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 22 VIEWS
fucking tease "Bleeding cheese"
📈 20 VIEWS
fucktwat "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 22 VIEWS
fuckwitFur Bunny "Berkshire Hunt"
📈 29 VIEWS
Get fucked "Get stuffed"
📈 21 VIEWS
get lost "Get up the apples."
📈 28 VIEWS
Get lost, loser "Get off, tea leaf"
📈 26 VIEWS
go finger yourself "Go have a butcher's at yourself."
📈 22 VIEWS
go lick a duck "Go take a butcher's."
📈 25 VIEWS
Go make me a sandwich "Go make me a Tom and Jerry"
📈 27 VIEWS
Go masturbate your dog "Go have a butcher's at your frog."
📈 27 VIEWS
gobble the helmet spit "Swallow the ginger nut chat"
📈 24 VIEWS
grab her by the pussy "Snatch her by the cat's whiskers"
📈 23 VIEWS
hard dick "Stiff Mick"
📈 24 VIEWS
hard oral sex "hard oral sex"
📈 25 VIEWS
he likes dick "He likes Hampton Wick."
📈 19 VIEWS
her pussy is as hairy as an 80's pornstar "Her cat's as hairy as a Barry Gibb."
📈 19 VIEWS
her pussy is as wet as an otters pocket "'Er cat's as wet as a butcher's hook."
📈 23 VIEWS
heterosexual "Normal and Natural"
📈 31 VIEWS
Hide Yourself "Get on your bike"
📈 25 VIEWS
his dick looks like a prisoners leg "His Hampton Wick looks like a tea leaf's peg."
📈 24 VIEWS
how the fuck "How the brass tack"
📈 27 VIEWS
hurt me "Skirt me."
📈 25 VIEWS
I fucked your mom last night "I Brahms and Liszt your trouble and strife last night."
📈 24 VIEWS
i hate looking at you "I hate having a butcher's at you."
📈 25 VIEWS
I have the body of a god—unfortunately the god of small, depressing villages. "I've got the body of a god—unfortunately the god of small, depressing ham and cheeses."
📈 22 VIEWS
i hope you die "I hope you brown bread."
📈 30 VIEWS
I hope you outlive your children "I hope you do a bit more than your dustbin lids."
📈 23 VIEWS
i hope you rot in hell "I hope you dog and bell."
📈 25 VIEWS
i just took a massive shit "I just dropped a massive Richard the Third."
📈 27 VIEWS
I like big butts "I like big King Tutts"
📈 29 VIEWS
I love you "Apples and pears."
📈 13 VIEWS
I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it. "I made a huge dog and bone list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it."
📈 22 VIEWS
I made a huge to-do list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it. "I made a huge dog and bone list today. I just need to figure out who’s going to do it."
📈 22 VIEWS
I think i crapped my pants "I think I’ve done a raspberry ripple in me strides."
📈 22 VIEWS
I told my boss to have a nice life. He said he already has one—I didn’t realize unemployment could be smug. "I told my trouble to have a nice kite. He said he already has one—I didn’t realize on the dole could be smug."
📈 22 VIEWS
I want to fuck you like a dog and cum inside your pussy "I want to have a Captain Cook like a dog and leave me custard in your cat."
📈 19 VIEWS
I want to watch you masturbate "I want to watch you have a J. Arthur."
📈 10 VIEWS
I was going to offer you a drink, but your standards are already watered down. "I was going to offer you a pig's ear, but your standards are already Adam and Eve'd."
📈 25 VIEWS
I won’t say you’re clingy—let’s just say you’ve got more hold than cheap superglue. "I won't say you're clingy—let's just say you've got more hold than a sticky wicket."
📈 24 VIEWS
I'm gonna beat the shit out of you "I'm gonna have a butcher's hook at you."
📈 22 VIEWS
i'm sorry my love "I'm sorry, my turtle dove."
📈 25 VIEWS
I've got a spare minute tell me everything you know "I've got a bit of rabbit, spill the beans."
📈 23 VIEWS
I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I’m afraid you’d be promoted to manager. "I'd tell you to take a butcher's at the Old Kent Road, but I'm worried you'd end up the dog's dinner."
📈 24 VIEWS
I’m about as comfortable as a whore in 8 am church service "I'm about as comfortable as a brass in a Sunday mass."
📈 26 VIEWS
I’m not saying I’m ugly, but my reflection asked for an escort home. "I'm not saying I'm a boat race, but my looking glass asked for a sherbet home."
📈 21 VIEWS
If karma doesn’t hit you, I will "If Barnet Fair doesn’t hit you, I will."
📈 29 VIEWS
If life gives you lemons, throw them at people you dislike—vitamin C with attitude. "If life gives you lemons, lob 'em at the ones you don't fancy—bit of vitamin C with a twist."
📈 28 VIEWS
If you don’t have haters, you’re probably not on the GPS of anyone’s drama. "If you don’t have taters, you’re probably not on the Gregory of anyone’s llama."
📈 26 VIEWS
kiss my ass "Kiss me Khyber."
📈 26 VIEWS
kiss my black ass "Kiss my brass band."
📈 21 VIEWS
lesbian "Kiki Dee"
📈 27 VIEWS
lick spittle "Gob and Whistle"
📈 25 VIEWS
look at this nigga "Have a butcher's at this geezer"
📈 27 VIEWS
make me a sandwich "Whistle and flute me a sarnie."
📈 27 VIEWS
My dating life is like a software beta: lots of bugs, endless updates, no launch date. "My dating life is like a loaf of bread: lots of mugs, endless mates, no first date."
📈 23 VIEWS
My family redefines ‘dysfunctional’—we’re a limited-time exhibit on bad decisions. "Me trouble and strife redefines ‘dysfunctional’—we’re a limited-time exhibit on bad decisions."
📈 24 VIEWS
my last girlfriend didn't do this to me "My last trouble and strife didn't do this to me."
📈 28 VIEWS
Nervous as a long tail cat in a room full of rocking chairs "Nervous as a bag of nerves in a room full of rocking chairs"
📈 23 VIEWS
nigga please "Apples and pears, mate."
📈 25 VIEWS
Off in that general direction is where I want you to fuck "Off in that general direction is where I want you to take a butcher's hook."
📈 24 VIEWS
once you go black you never go back "Once you go coal, you never stroll."
📈 27 VIEWS
one coffee please "One cup of Rosie Lee, please."
📈 28 VIEWS
Our family tree is more of a cactus—spiky, low-maintenance, and occasionally poisonous. "Our apples and pears is more of a dustbin lid—spiky, low-maintenance, and occasionally pony and trap."
📈 23 VIEWS
Paint the walls with your brain "Decorate the walls with your loaf"
📈 24 VIEWS
Penis "Hampton Wick"
📈 25 VIEWS
please ask my testacles "please ask my testacles"
📈 29 VIEWS
saggy tits "Baggy bits"
📈 21 VIEWS
scumbag "Tea leaf"
📈 25 VIEWS
semen "Cream of the crop"
📈 24 VIEWS
shit gibbon "Crap Ribbon"
📈 47 VIEWS
show your tits "Get your Bristol Cities out"
📈 24 VIEWS
show your tits! "Get your Bristols out!"
📈 27 VIEWS
shut the fuck up "shut the fuck up"
📈 28 VIEWS
shut the hell up "shut the hell up"
📈 25 VIEWS
shut up "shut up"
📈 27 VIEWS
shut your god damn mouth "Shut your north and south."
📈 24 VIEWS
son of a prostitute "Hampstead Heath"
📈 25 VIEWS
Suck my dick asshole. "Have a butcher's at me Hampton, you berk."
📈 22 VIEWS
Suck start a shotgun "Gobble a sawn-off."
📈 26 VIEWS
Sweating like a gypsy with a morgage "Sweating like a gypsy with a bottle."
📈 22 VIEWS
thick as pig shit "Thick as two short planks"
📈 26 VIEWS
This project is going to be fucking great "This project is going to be a fucking china plate."
📈 27 VIEWS
tight as a ducks ass "Tight as a drum."
📈 23 VIEWS
tits "Bristol Cities"
📈 23 VIEWS
turd "Richard the Third"
📈 27 VIEWS
Useful as a one legged man in an ass kicking contest "Useful as a one-legged man in a bottle and glass."
📈 31 VIEWS
Useless "Adam and Eve"
📈 27 VIEWS
Useless piece of shit "Useless bottle and glass"
📈 25 VIEWS
Well, well, well, look at what the cat dragged in! "Well, well, well, look at what the dog and bone dragged in!"
📈 25 VIEWS
wet pussy "Soggy moggy"
📈 20 VIEWS
What color is your underwear "What color is your smalls"
📈 26 VIEWS
what do you want for dinner? "What do you want for plates of meat?"
📈 25 VIEWS
what the devil "What the trouble and strife"
📈 24 VIEWS
what the fuck dude "What the Donald Duck, china?"
📈 25 VIEWS
What's cooking, good lookin'? "What's the kettle, treacle?"
📈 21 VIEWS
Where is the bathroom? "Where's the khazi?"
📈 25 VIEWS
whore "Brass Flute"
📈 23 VIEWS
you are completely right "You’re bang on the money."
📈 29 VIEWS
you are so fat "You're a right boat race."
📈 24 VIEWS
you are so fine "You are so wine and dine."
📈 22 VIEWS
you are so ugly "You are a right boat race."
📈 26 VIEWS
you are such a baddie "You're such a tea leaf."
📈 29 VIEWS
You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room. "You bring everyone so much plates of meat when you scarper out the room."
📈 25 VIEWS
you're a baddi "You're a tea leaf."
📈 25 VIEWS
you're a baddie "You're a tea leaf."
📈 27 VIEWS
you're a cunt, fuck off "You're a Berk, take a butchers."
📈 24 VIEWS
You're fucking this goat, I'm just here to hold the horns "You're having a bubble, I'm just here to hold the apples."
📈 22 VIEWS
You're higher than giraffe pussy "You're higher than a kite in flight."
📈 23 VIEWS
You’re proof evolution can go backward with proper motivation. "You're proof that the old dog and bone can go back with a bit of jam tart."
📈 27 VIEWS
your face looks like an ass "Your boat race looks like a bottle and glass."
📈 23 VIEWS
Your personality is like decaf: disappointing but could still ruin my night "Your personality's like a cup of Rosie: a bit of a letdown but could still do me crust in."
📈 24 VIEWS